Gert Garibaldi's Rants and Raves: One Butt Cheek at a Time
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- $6.99
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- $6.99
Publisher Description
GERT GARIBALDI ISN'T ONE OF those people who believe high school is the best part of life. She has a whole notebook full of rants about high school, and she's fully aware of how ridiculous the experience is, thank you very much. Gert just wants to survive the next three years, one butt cheek at a time, with her best friend, Adam, by her side - and maybe Luscious Luke attached to her lips. With a stapler. Or something. But muddling through isn't even as easy as it seems - there are geriatric parents to deal with, Homecoming festivities (admit itÑthose words just sent a little chill down your spine), crushes, ed (both sex and driving), and potential new boyfriends - for both Gert and Adam. Frank, funny, and totally unique, Gert's ready to pull on the Pants of Life and start dancing.
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
First-time novelist Kizer launches a projected YA series with this occasionally witty tale of 15-year-old Gert Garibaldi. She's a Brain (smart kid) struggling to fit into her high school world filled with Pops (popular kids), Giggles (trendy kids), and Things (bad boys/jocks). Best friend Adam serves as Gert's lifeline and confidant, until he meets a cute boy and drops her like a hot potato. With no one to help her cope with some cringeworthy parenting and two burgeoning crushes, the sarcastic Gert flounders before pouring her heart into a diary. Titling entries either rants or raves, Gert's writings on random topics humorously showcase her angst. However, these entries crop up somewhat abruptly throughout the narrative, often breaking its flow. The author also endows Gert with a fascination with sex and her body, which at first makes her seem real and representative of the target audience, but later goes too far, so that Gert sounds almost fixated. When appraising her appearance in the mirror, Gert says in a panic, "Mts. Everest and Kilimanjaro squished together are less conspicuous than my ass . I have the world's largest tush. I require a UN escort for international travel. Maybe even NATO." Younger teen readers will relate to Gert's insecurity and to her typical troubles, but even they may tire of her self-obsessed ramblings. Ages 14-up.
