The Common Thread
Mothers and Daughters: The Bond We Never Outgrow
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- $8.99
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- $8.99
Publisher Description
No relationship is more fulfilling, infuriating, emotional, and problematic than that of mother and daughter. Now, in a work filled with truth, surprises, and humor, renowned psychologist and author Martha Manning offers mothers and daughters of all ages a new way to understand each other. Challenging the accepted premise that this powerful bond must be severed for emotional growth, Manning shows us why this precious attachment is never outgrown, how, if it is damaged, it can be healed, and what will enrich this lifelong commitment while fostering essential independence. The key is empathy, and Manning provides potent tools to help us build stronger ties and celebrate the crazy twists, joys, and secrets inherent in this most glorious of life connections.
Combining personal experiences and scrupulous research, The Common Thread helps each of us develop a mutually empowering relationship -- and laugh, too -- as we more deeply connect with and appreciate the mother or daughter we love.
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
For women whose automatic response to the word "mother" is a groan followed by a sigh, clinical psychologist Manning (All Seasons Pass: Grieving a Miscarriage) offers a new view on a relationship that begins at conception and can continue long after the other's death. Manning argues persuasively that empathy is the thread that links mothers and daughters from pregnancy and childbirth through adolescence, young adulthood, midlife and beyond. By walking in the other's shoes whether they're baby booties, size 6 Air Jordans or spike heels mother and daughter can learn to match the way the other feels. "Human beings aren't born empathic," notes Manning. "If we were, we'd sleep through the night and not make such dreadful messes in our diapers." But empathy alone is not enough. Using the example of a woman who soothingly rocks a hungry baby but does not feed it, Manning insists that empathy requires action. To underscore her ideas, Manning offers selections from a wide range of writings, from the Talmud to pieces by Barbara Kingsolver, Dorothy Allison and Erica Jong. She advises mothers of teen girls to adopt a new mantra "I can't win" that will change as both grow older, and shows how years later time and culture can create new misunderstandings between older daughters and their elderly moms. Tales of her own struggles raising her daughter, the indignities of aging (she admits to occasionally wearing Depends) and her relationship with her mother personalize her message about empathy as a bridge across generations.
