How to Eat Like a Republican
Or, Hold the Mayo, Muffy - I'm Feeling Miracle Whipped Tonight: A Cookbook
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- $7.99
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- $7.99
Publisher Description
This is part cookbook, part how-to for non-Republicans, part payback ("Thanks, Mom, for all the swell tricks with Lipton Onion Soup Mix"), and part sheer revenge, as in for one horrifying night when the author was invited to dinner by a coven of Democrats under the pretext of eating a decent whole roasted prime tenderloin and was cruelly served a whole roasted baby tuna. Her date, a Republican fish-hater (a Republican redundancy, by the way, see Chapter 3, Fish), memorably reacted by getting dead drunk and passing out at the table with his face in the tuna. This capriciously-organized collection of the kinds of homey recipes Republicans grow up on pays little regard to attribution, since, in the words of the author, "Nobody ever remembers where the recipe originally came from anyway."
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
The Northeast Cultural Elite, a frequent butt of Townsend's bemused disdain, isn't likely to take eagerly to such fare as Vel-Veto Power Ro*Tel Dip, which consists of a pound of Velveeta cheese and a can of Ro*Tel tomatoes and green chilies; or Miss Scarlett's Saltine Salad, made of a sleeve of saltines, 1 cups of Miracle Whip, a tomato, scallions and hard-boiled eggs. But then, this collection of often outrageously inelegant recipes is intended far more to dish up a few laughs than to impress demanding palates. Townsend says her anti-Democrat focus is "food over frou-frou, life before balsamic vinegar," and she rarely deviates from this occasionally amusing perspective from which she genially pokes fun at such obvious targets as those who voted for Hillary Rodham Clinton and the Whitewater affair. Coca-Cola and ketchup are two of her most prized ingredients, and their savory goodness reaches startling heights in Chicken Gizzard Candy with Ketchup and Coke, and Straub's Sticky Chickies in Coke, the latter calling only for ketchup, Coke and split chicken breasts. Townsend, a former ad executive, also gathers recipes associated with political icons: Senator Goldwater's Chili, Buffalo Right Wings (An Homage to Pat Buchanan) and Rush's Mom's Fluffy Potato Casserole. After describing Favorite Wild Duck of the NRA as "rich as a Republican after a tax cut," however, Townsend does waver from the party line by slipping balsamic vinegar into Sizzling Pine Nut Salad and Fast and Fancy Veal Chops. Illus.
