What White Parents Should Know about Transracial Adoption
An Adoptee's Perspective on Its History, Nuances, and Practices
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- $12.99
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- $12.99
Publisher Description
The White Fragility for transracial adoption--practical tools for nurturing identity, unlearning white saviorism, and fixing the mistakes you don't even know you're making.
If you're the white parent of a transracially or internationally adopted child, you may have been told that if you try your best and work your hardest, good intentions and a whole lot of love will be enough to give your child the security, attachment, and nurturing family life they need to thrive.
The only problem? It's not true. What White Parents Should Know About Transracial Adoption breaks down the dynamics that frequently fly under the radar of the whitewashed, happily-ever-after adoption stories we hear so often.
Written by Melissa Guida-Richards--a transracial, transnational, and late-discovery adoptee--this book unpacks the mistakes you don't even know you're making and gives you the real-life tools to be the best parent you can be, to the child you love more than anything.
From original research, personal stories, and interviews with parents and adoptees, you'll learn:
What parents wish they'd known before they adopted--and what kids wish their adoptive parents had done differentlyWhat white privilege, white saviorism, and toxic positivity are...and how they show up, even when you don't mean itHow your child might feel and experience the world differently than youAll about microaggressions, labeling, and implicit biasHow to help your child connect with their cultural heritage through language, food, music, and clothingThe 5 stages of grief for adoptive parentsHow to start tough conversations, work with defensiveness, and process guilt
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
Adoptee Thoughts podcaster Guida-Richards (Bedtime, the Ultimate Battle) takes on racism in the adoption industry in this trenchant survey. Born in Colombia and adopted by a family in the United States, Guida-Richards shares the trauma and complex emotions she experienced after she learned about her adoption at age 19: she struggled with her identity and was accused of being ungrateful if she asked questions. In highlighting what she considers the systemic racism in adoption, Guida-Richards calls out practices such as agencies charging prospective parents a higher fee to adopt a white infant than to adopt a Black infant. Additionally, she writes, adoptions in America have historically functioned to "uphold racially homogenous families." Countering white savior attitudes, color blindness, toxic positivity, and entitlement is critical for creating more ethical adoptions, Guida-Richards suggests. To that end, she encourages prospective parents to ask themselves tough questions before they choose to adopt (such as "What kind of anti-racist work am I involved in?"), to accept the truth that their child will face racism, and to be active listeners. She's incisive, and her arguments are eye-opening. This is a powerful, worthwhile addition to the growing body of work on race and parenting.
Customer Reviews
A must read for APs or HAPs
Melissa does an amazing job of eloquently tackling difficult topics and not backing down to advocate for adoptees. I’m so sad I read the book so quickly, but this is a book I will continue to come back to again and again. So many helpful and insightful food for thought.